Do you and your partner talk to each other about money? If you’re in a serious relationship, is money ever an issue? It’s no secret that money problems are consistently cited as a leading cause of divorce. Money on an individual level can be very stressful and hard to manage. Adding another person to the mix can quickly make it harder to manage and even more stressful. 

Unfortunately, as much as we want to believe that money isn’t a huge part of life, it is. Money can be linked to almost every area of life so having a good grasp on it individually and as a couple is very important. 

How to go about it and when you should introduce money talk into a relationship is not an exact science but there are certainly good places to start.

Why should you talk about money in your relationship?

I like to know the reason behind everything so let’s start with why this is important. Imagine being in a relationship with someone for years and eventually taking a big step together whether that be moving in or even getting married. Now imagine finding out after that big step is taken that your partner has over $100,000 in debt, has no money saved, and has a spending problem. 

You, on the other hand, are by no means rich, but you’ve worked hard to save, invest and keep your debt as low as possible. You may be thinking “how can you possibly get to that point in your relationship and not know about this beforehand?”. While that’s a valid question, you’d be shocked at how many times this happens. Talking about money in a relationship can be scary and uncomfortable, so many people put it off until they have no other choice left. 

You should talk about your finances in a relationship because being on the same page is important. If you find out your partner had all that debt and no money saved before taking a big step, it doesn’t mean you have to leave them or you suddenly wouldn’t love them anymore but it would give both parties a better understanding of the situation and would allow both to work together openly and honestly instead of finding out so late in the game which would likely lead to some tension in the relationship. This is why it is so important to address your finances with your partner.

When should you talk to your partner about money?

Deciding when to introduce money talk into your relationship will be different for everyone. Some couples may have no problem doing it very early on but for others, it may be a little harder. There isn’t a perfect time to do it, however, I would say it’s important to do it before taking a big step together like moving out or getting married and definitely before combining finances if that’s where the relationship is heading. 

How should you talk to your partner about money?

This is another question that doesn’t have a straightforward answer. How to have the money talk will also look different for every couple. It can naturally come up over time in normal conversations or it might have to be something that you need to bring up more deliberately. How you bring it up should ultimately be in whatever way is comfortable for you and your partner.

You don’t need to ask someone for a full personal balance sheet and credit report on your first date (although that sounds kinda fun 🤣 ) but it should be something that gets discussed at some point as your relationship progresses to the more serious stages. 

You wouldn’t move in or marry someone without knowing that you had common values, interests, and other qualities. Knowing that you are on the same page about money can be just as important as all the other things you look for in a partnership. Being open and honest about money can help not only bring you and your partner closer together but can help save you a lot of relationship troubles in the long run. It’s always best to talk about it early and often. 

Nothing on this blog should be considered personal actionable advice, research, or an invitation to buy or sell any securities. Consider all risks before investing, including the loss of your hard-earned money. Vee is an Investment Advisor for Warren Street Wealth Advisors, this blog reflects her personal views and not that of Warren Street.